sorry about that post. i was down in the dumps so i forced myself to go swimming and met a friend to talk about my project. it's ok now i dont' feel like quitting school. i need to be level headed that's all. and less emotional. less escapist. live life prioritised, including knowing what to do, if not, seek advice and go do some sports for induced calm, and induced adrenalin, and not lie on my bed staring at the ceiling the whole afternoon.

the downs are so down, the ups are so up. on hindsight i guess it is probably better to have lived life feeling great joy and enlightenment at the expense of angsty depression than to have life banal.

so while i am riding high on the hope that i can create beauty and wonder with my own hands and mind, i will work through the night and aspire to feel achievement in the morning.